Change Ahead.

I have been doing a 21-day meditation with my good friends Oprah and Deepak. They sure are nice. We have coffee and chat and then meditate. They have lots of good advice too. I love friends like that.

Anywho...

...one of the afternoons I spent with O and D, they said some things I thought I would share with you
---about change.

Change is hard. We all hate change. In fact, I just auditioned for a TV show where my character said the exact same thing. (It's following me!) CHANGE SUCKS. We think keeping things the same is easier. 

Well Deepak says "There is wisdom in change." Yes I know. Blah blah blah. Wisdome-schmisdom! Change still sucks, kim. But he's right. We learn in change, right? We learn more of what we want, what we don't want, who we are. Etcetera etcetera etcetera.

It's in change that we begin to more closely align our lives to what we want. It's like a "get out of jail free" card. Scary but true. 

So seek out the new and fresh. See how it feels. Try something unknown. There is nothing terrible in the unknown. It's just unknown. It could be wonderful. How do you know? So no need to be afraid.Improv teaches us to SAY YES. Foundational improv tool: SAY YES. It's how things move forward. It's how things happen. So I'm a firm believer and coach in always saying yes. I try to also live by that philosophy as much as possible. 

YES!

Well my buddy Deepak likes the idea too. But he says it a little differently. He suggests us to "say yes more than you say no." Love that Deepy! It's even easier for those of us more fearful. You don't have to say yes all the time, just say yes more than you say no. Today. 

And then tomorrow.

And then the next day and see how your life changes. 

You have a little courage today so you can have more tomorrow.

ALL of this leads to a more dynamic life. And isn't that what we all want?

A more dynamic life.

Hang on, Oprah's at the door. I gotta get this...

YES!

Let's talk about the elephant in the room.

The other day, late in the day, I looked in the mirror. I had way too much blush on! What in the world? How did this happen? Why did no one tell me? All day I was wearing this much blush?! I quickly wiped some off.

Later that night, I lost my blush brush.

Coincidence? I don't think so.  Dun. Dun. Dun!

But for realz, I think it's connected. Somehow, in some way. I think it's aaaaaalll connected. I think the universe provides these little connections for us all the time. (i.e. takes away our blush brush so we don't abuse that privilege again! For sure!) We just usually miss the signs. We're too busy or too tired or too...something to notice. This makes me think...

Ever notice how if say for example, you hear a friend talk about elephants, suddenly elephants are everywhere? They're on the subway adverts, on your facebook feed, on a discarded flyer on the street? Or somebody mentions a trip to Paris and suddenly the person next to you on the train is speaking French and you see a mural of the Eiffel Tower on your way home that you never noticed before and you get a  French language catalog in the mail that day, etc. etc.

Honestly, I think this happens all the time. We just miss it. But it serves as a good reminder when it does happen.  Is it the ability we all have to manifest or simply the ability we all have to notice? I don't know. I believe in manifestation certainly, but I also believe it can be hard and I believe noticing is easier. But then again maybe noticing is manifesting. Maybe all it takes is awareness. I like this superpower to bring what we want or are resonating with to life, simply with awareness.

Which then leads to the question: What are you not noticing? What, if you would just notice, could make a difference in your life? How can your life become fuller with more connections or coincidences?

Open your eyes. Look around. Maybe you'll see an elephant or, I mean...whatever it is you're looking for.


As always, please share your thoughts and reactions below.

How to become an office superhero

I just finished teaching four days of presentation skills through improv and authenticity training.

To accountants.

Oi. :)

They started off skeptical. Completely. Skeptical. "There's a certain way things are done. There's a "company" way of presenting. Who was I to tell them otherwise, anyway?"

But my job was to help them be more authentically themselves and use that same newly discovered authenticity in their internal and external speeches. But as it stood now, there was no speech or speaker, there was only powerpoint and graphs and bullet points. There was no cohesion. No story. No sense of self.

They were afraid: What if higher-ups or potential clients didn't like who they really were? What if they thought they were 'unprofessional'? What if they failed? Good Lord, what if they failed? A questions we ask ourselves all the time. What if I fail? "If I am my authentic self, what if someone doesn't like it? Doesn't like me? And what if that person is important in my life -- like a boss or a spouse? Yikes. Scary indeed.

Being authentic is always a risk. But being who you are sets you apart from the pack. It actually makes you who you are. Being who you are is what no one else can do. Being who you are makes you happy and successful. Anything else is living a lie. And who wants to do that?

And when you bring that--that sense of authentic self-- to a speech or a presentation or a conversation. Jinkys! A miracle occurs!

Everyone presented a speech at beginning of the first day and the same speech, revamped, at the end of the last day. Transformation occurred.

Speeches that I could not even begin to wrap my brain around on day one suddenly made sense. People who I thought must be so miserable in their daily lives, suddenly came to life and were fully realized people standing in front of me. I listened. I was engaged---on topics I have no interest in!! Their authenticity brought about my presence. In other words, their realness brought about mine. We were alive again, in communication. Possibility existed.

This is what happens when you risk showing your authentic self: truth, engagement, connection.

Heck, you may even become an office superhero!

Lake Michigan Epiphanies

Improv teaches commit.

In order to have a successful scene, one needs to commit fully to where they are and what they are doing. Accept! Accept! Be there for real 100% and then see what happens. Usually funny, truth and the unexpected happens. It's why I love improv.

I spent eleven years in New York City without ever really fully committing, truth be told. Sure I had an apartment (several in fact!) I had friends and a community and a church and jobs and other things that make a home, but I never really made it my home. Of course, I would never admit that at the time. No way. New York was home!

Don't get me wrong, I loved New York, truly, but it was never really home. It was always a place I was for a while. I always wondered inside when I would leave. I mean, I kept an apartment in Minneapolis for that entire time! I had furniture in Minneapolis! Wine glasses! Things! Minneapolis was always my fallback. "Well, I can always return there!" (and who knows I still might for cry-i...) After all, friends and family and potential employment lived in Minneapolis. And this is to say nothing of the extended time I spent in Mexico, being gone for months at a time. I think it some ways it held me back from fully being present and accepting NYC as my home. I don't think that was bad or good. It just was.

And now I have moved to Chicago. And I almost felt myself falling into the same trap. "I'll try Chicago for a while. Who knows for how long..." Not that there is anything wrong with that. It's how I have lived my last 14 years, but something has shifted (age?) and I feel the need to lay down some roots, to stake some claims, to be fully present where I am and in what I am doing...to commit. I said it: I feel the need to commit. So I went back to Minneapolis and picked up my wine glasses. They're all here now.

So, yes, I live in Chicago. And for now that's where I'll be. I'll still likely flit off to Mexico now and then to run an artist residency or two, as I do love Mexico :), but probably less. I want to work in Chicago and be a fixture, not a guest.

Recently, I was walking on the beach of Lake Michigan near my new apartment that I have committed to being in for at least the next year or two, and I was thinking, "I'm super lucky!" I have work I mostly love, an agent who believes in me, opportunities in Mexico and elsewhere, I have new friends, a family who lives close, an amazing new apartment that makes me happy and I can walk to a beach!! The beach!

I am here and the truth is --- I love it.

And even if sometimes I don't...just saying the words changes things.

"How do you like chicago?"

"I love it!"

I'm committing. And then --- who knows? Maybe Chicago will commit to me.

Rings and all.

On being happy

So...

Recently a friend, whose name shall remain anonymous (Adrienne), posed the question to me: When are you happiest?

An interesting question.

I am happy in Mexico. Happy feeling loved by dear friends. Happy laughing. Happy by water. Happy in my new apartment. Happy while acting. Happy drinking good coffee or good beer. Happy in the ocean. Happy in one of my long 'life' conversations with my mom. Happy creating something. Happy looking at a full moon. Happy traveling. Happy on the beach. (Did I mention water?)

But happiest?

I suppose I am happiest when I am living in the present moment fully, as improv teaches, appreciating all the nuances and particulars of this time of this day. I'm happiest when I am breathing in life---like at the beach or with friends or onstage. I am not happy when I am not present. That's the truth. So check yourself: if you're not happy maybe you're not really here.

I believe the more present you are in your life, the more you create the kind of life where you are happy in that present moment. Does that make sense? You shape your moments by living in them fully. Eventually you shape more and more moments into "good" ones because nobody wants to live in sucky moments.

Right now, as I type this, the sun has set and I am sitting on a sweet balcony overlooking a beautiful plaza in Guanajuato. Yes, I am happy. But I am also aware and that makes me happy (er?). I hear the constant chopping of a food vendor across the square. I hear a late night worker hammering something a block away. I smell fresh tortillas from below. I see streetlamp shadows play on the square. I hear voices of locals and tourists walk by. I see a man with a backpack probably walking home. I feel the slight chill of the breeze against my bare legs. I hear laughter and some guy making a weird "Heh! sound. I am present. To it all. I shaped this moment. And I am happy. Right now.

Maybe even happiest.

How about you? (Adrienne wants to know...)

BIG and OVERWHELMING

I'm finishing final edits to my memoir before resubmitting to publishers and agents. What a haul. It's like birthing a baby---but takes longer than nine months, I tell ya! It's easy to lose your perspective, to lose the point of it all. Is it worth it? How do we keep our perspective? It's hard to keep a commitment to a long term creative project when there is so much daily life that gets in the way.

Can you identify? Have you ever lost or almost lost the will to finish a creative project?

For me, in order to continue, it's about breaking it down into little chunks. Palatable bites, if you will:

The idea of publishing my book is too big. Who has time for that!? But finishing the latest edits on the first part....thats sorta doable. Making a list of current agents I'm interested in? Sure, I can do that. That actually sounds like fun! But it has to be in small bite size chunks or else forget about it.

That's probably true of anything in life.  Bite size chunks so you don't choke.

I would love it if you would share your successes/tricks to keeping committed to a long term creative project in the comments below.

Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale....

I've been digging around again in the land of storytelling for a new client I have with KSi. Our goal together was to create better, more authentic storytellers in their company, which will then also translate to a better communicating of the brand. Think of JetBlue, Google, Amazon, Starbucks---they are all brands with a strong story and we buy into those stories---daily! We buy into how those stories make us feel. We become part of an brand event they create for us---like a Facebook event but bigger and more subtle. Thats what a good brand story is. And I help to train better brand storytellers.

That session inspired me.

So I decided to start doing my own storytelling again. I used to tell stories in NYC, even winning a MOTH Story Slam. But I hadn't performed a story on a stage in years. But last week, I went to a storytelling event in Chicago---Story Club. I hadn't planned on telling a story. I wasn't really prepared, but there were a few spots open and they kept asking for volunteers. I kept saying "no" to myself. I wasn't ready. But then I asked myself: What was I waiting for? I wanted to tell a story and as unprepared as I was, the fact was I wanted to tell a story. So I dug around in my mental files for a story.

I had just told a story at the recent corporate training about jumping off a train in Prague, but how I used it there was more anecdotal. So how could I flesh out a full story, moments before I would tell it here? I sat at the bar, nursing my oversized beer (possible problem??) and figured it out. Then I went up to the host and asked if I could tell my story.

I ended up winning the audience vote that night---mostly because I jumped. 

We all have stories inside us. Sometimes we're not ready to tell them. Sometimes we haven't even identified them yet. But they always have value. They define us. Our stories make us who we are. And we all have one. It just depends on how willing we are to jump.

How willing are you to tell your story when the opportunity comes?

Willingness to Change

Change is hard. Period.

No one will deny that. 

Also listening can be hard. Period. (That's a lot of periods. Why so many Kim? My shoes feel tight today...) We are so full of our own thoughts and ideas that it's sometimes hard to separate out the static.

Improv geniuses TJ and Dave (TJ Jagodowski and Dave Pasquesi) said (one or both of them at any rate): "Listening is the willingness to change". I think that's rather profound.

Listening is the willingness to change. Hm. So. In order to truly listen, we must be willing to change. To be changed. Dang it. That's hard. We don't necessarily want to be changed. We are often comfortable where we are. I don't know about you, but sometimes to me, change seems unnecessary and like an awful lot of work. Right? Can't I just listen and stay exactly where I am, in my comfortable-I know-things-and don't-want-to-think-place?

But think about the last really great conversation you had. We are changed. We are different after time and conversation with a good friend. And even in the brief interactions of our day, if we truly listen we are changed.

This plays out on stage quite dynamically with good improvisors. Actor A says something. Actor B can ignore, sort of accept it or listen deeply and actually let it be a gift -- a mind-blowing, life-changing gift. If Actor B chooses the latter, the scene moves, flies, entertains. It looks scripted. It's fun. If Actor B ignores or only partially listens/accepts, that actor has to work really hard to create, to think, to salvage the scene. Would have just been easier to listen and be moved. Would actually be easier to just be changed.

In your next opportunity, see how willing you are to change--- i.e. listen. And then see what happens.

Back in Mexico

Here I sit on the shores of the Mexican Caribbean writing you. I know. Shut up Kim.

I am beginning another session of the AKUMAL INTERNATIONAL ARTIST RESIDENCY. Four wonderful new artists will be arriving on Wednesday for five weeks. They will be creating, teaching, sharing and engaging with the community. I'm here to make sure that happens.To follow more about the residency and to virtually meet the artists, see the blog at www.akumalresidency.com

I am excited for the possible connections that will happen between artists and between artists and community, all in magical Akumal.

Gratitude.

New York. Again. One more time

I am feeling melancholy.

I am back in New York to finish things. (Although I wonder if one ever "finishes things" with New York City.)

I am back in town for ten days to pack/clean/socialize/experience and, well...finish. I have more or less officially moved to Chicago. My things are there. My work is there. My cat is there. So I must live there.

And New York? Well, New York is seemingly my past. But yesterday, today and for the next nine days, it is my present. And in it, I find myself nostalgic and torn, content and discontent, assaulted and embraced, inspired and annoyed. New York. It's everything.

A friend said, "New York never changes" And this has given me pause. It feels like it indeed did change. Or I did. I'm not sure which. New York still offers all it did: a dizzying array of everything. This is what I love about New York. Anything is possible: opening an improv school, creating your own work, traveling to the middle east as a playwright on commission, working as an actual paralegal, falling in love with a refugee, selling Iraqi art, dinner at 4am, summer in the Hamptons, unlimited mimosa brunch, discovering Time Warner cable is your mortal enemy, Times Square blackouts, Broadway auditions, ludicrously asking Ludicrous for water, sitting in the jury of "Law and Order", overshadowing Sarah Jessica Parker, pizza for a buck, cocktails for 22, an A train teen acrobat show for less (It's showtime!!), homeless man poetry readings, cheap mani/pedis, meeting soon to be friends from all over the world...literally. It's all here. It's all still here.

And yet, it feels different.

Maybe I need more space or more quiet or more family or more work or less options or less stimulation or less concrete or less isolation. I don't know yet. I could stay here forever. Easily. But I never wanted to. After ten years...is it time to leap into the next?

Seems I already have. I think I'm done.

They say "New York will always be here if you want to come back." But people really don't, do they? Or I won't. Probably. Sure, New York will always be here, but it's not the same. Once you leave, it's not the same; you're no longer in the club.

As a committed liver and lover of New York, you are part of a club. It's unwritten, but we all know we belong. We have all agreed to put up with the crowds and the crazy and the rats and the garbage and the noise and the urine and the tourists and the tight otherwise-impossible-to-live-in-spaces in exchange for...everything. And when you agree to leave that, you become merely an outsider looking in; no longer a member of the club --- just another observer slash admirer of New York --- from the outside.

But today, I am in the middle.  Not in or out. Still here, almost gone. But still a card carrying member.

I am standing on the precipice between old and new, past and future, New York and non-New York. I made the choice. Or New York did. I'm not sure which.

But it's over New York. Damn.

Don't get me wrong: Like any old, hard-to-get-over love--- I will always long for you, I will always dream of you. I will always...wonder.

But I will no longer live here. With you. Like this.

In other words...it's finished.

...with love and gratitude.

Hugh of my Heart!

I love the TV show House. I was a bit addicted to it in fact: smart, funny, quite entertaining. And then there's Hugh Laurie -- handsome, charming, brilliant, infuriating, depressive, rude, crazy ego-maniac. And cute! Heavy sigh. Ahhhh House...

And now I love him even more, after recently having read a quote attributed to him:

“It's a terrible thing, I think, in life to wait until you're ready. I have this feeling now that actually no one is ever ready to do anything. There's almost no such thing as ready. There's only now. And you may as well do it now. I mean, I say that confidently as if I'm about to go bungee jumping or something - I'm not. I'm not a crazed risk taker. But I do think that, generally speaking, now is as good a time as any.”

Take it from the good doctor: We are rarely ready. And if we wait until we are ready, we will be waiting forever. There's only now. 

Indeed, ol' blue eyes, indeed. 

Now is as good of a time as any.

Lessons From a Neighbor

I have the most generous neighbors.
 
It's kinda crazy. They're seriously amazingly generous with me. I moved into this building about 9 months ago and they live across the hall. We share a fire escape. That's all.  We're very different. I'm in the arts. They're very much not. But from the get-go, they have offered their friendship and have been completely kind and giving in many ways.

Don't get me wrong. I have many generous friends. And my mom is always ridiculously generous with me. I know generosity, but these guys are barely friends and certainly not family. They're just neighbors, yet they give and give.

For example, lately Jackie has been going to the cheap fruit store and randomly buying me fruit! She comes home with fresh blueberries, strawberries, peaches and more. She texts me: "I have fruit for you when you're home!" I of course try to offer her money, but she refuses. She offers to take me to Target and then shares her discount. "It's 15%. Let me buy your things. You can just pay me back whenever." Practically every time, they cook, they offer me dinner. "We have plenty. Join us!" Recently, she offered my cucumbers, Febreeze and a new lock for my storage unit.

Nothing is ever required or expected in return---honestly. Try as I may. They want nothing in return. Now of course I have given them treats and thanks and jams and whatnots, but their generosity seems to continually surpass mine.

And their generosity isn't just specific to me, I have found.

At one of our aforementioned trips to Target, we had a cart full of wares and approached the checkout line at exactly the same time as another customer. Actually, I am pretty sure we were there first. So I smiled and moved in front of the other customer, trying to assume my place in the line. At the same time, Jackie, said to the lady "Oh no, you can go! Please." At first, I was annoyed. As I said, we were there first! And as a general rule, I am in a hurry. But then, I paused. I realized how little it mattered in the grand scheme of things. Jackie didn't care if we had to wait five more minutes. She was generous with her time and her place in the line. I was not.

It made me think.

How generous am I? Am I as generous as Jackie? One definition of generosity is "the quality or fact of being plentiful or large". I try to live from abundance and plenty. I believe there is plenty for all of us. But do I honestly share that abundance with others? Or am I frugal? As I said, it made me think.

Improv asks us to listen and receive, to take and build, to share. I do it on stage. How much do I do it on life? How generous am I?

Being their neighbor has been a lesson in generosity and a lesson in receiving. A lesson I am grateful for. It's made me try to live more intentionally generously. How about you?

As a special treat: here's a My Little Pony song called "Generosity"

Yes. My Little Pony. 

 Enjoy.

Leap into the Chaos

I'm writing again. Sigh. Yes, finally back at the book.

And I'm in a difficult spot. My editor wants order and outlines and some form of chronology, and while I agree with her in some ways and realize its purpose, I need to trust my gut and write the book I want to write. The challenge is how to keep what I know but be open to what she suggests. There are things I don't know about this book, but there are just as many things that I do. So the only way I know to do this comes from my improv training: just jump and listen to myself.

I'm not gonna lie to you. It ain't easy. I waited four months out of fear to do it at all! It is overwhelming to literally throw your book up in the air and see where the pages land. Is a new order preferable and cleaner? Was the old way, my instinctual way...better? Is there a way to combine both?

It is chaotic and I was/am scared to jump into the chaos. I mean...it might not work(!) but what choice is there? I haven't done all this work writing this book to just leave it on my hard drive gathering dust. No. I need to jump into the chaos and see what clarity I can find once the dust settles.

Where in your life do you need to jump into the chaos? Where in your life will it benefit you to throw it all up in the air and see what lands where? Is it easy? Um, no. But necessary? Maybe...

I'll let you know what I discover.

Share your thoughts below. Would love to interact with you. Love this quote from my man Deepak:

Heads up!

So I was sitting at Starbucks last week working on editing my memoir when I started to text my friend Michael. We texted for probably fifteen minutes off and on about minutia and silliness, nothing important. I was just working and occasionally texting him. He lives nearby the Starbucks, so at one point, bored and searching for distraction, I invited him to join me at the coffee superpower.

He asked me if I just arrived there. I replied I hadn't, that in fact I had been sitting here for over two hours. Turns out, ten minutes prior, while he was texting me, he was at the very same Starbucks himself, ordering a drink right across from the table at which I was sitting. We were texting each other while standing less than ten feet from the other! How did neither of us ever look up? How did we miss the moment to observe surroundings and consequently each other? What a silly miss. We laughed it off, but it made me think. What else am I missing when I don't look up? When else am I buried in something when an opportunity for connection, the one I was actually seeking, is right in front of me?

Food for thought: Look up.

The Little Moments...

How true!

I just finished reading a lovely article about the importance of the small interactions in our days, the little moments which often slip by us unnoticed. Too often, we go through our commutes and coffee purchases and street bumps without so much as a boo. We are busy with our iPhones and iPods and iBuds. (is that a thing?) that we miss it. We miss everything. We miss the little moments, the little interactions, the MOMENTS that make up our days and our lives. We miss the billboard advertising what we need. We miss the child looking at us. We miss the woman who desperately needs a smile. We miss a potential new friend, the opportunity for kindness, the hello, the thank you, the... everything.

How many moments are you missing? How many did you already miss just today?

I like the idea that when you engage in the moment, you get happier.  The little moments, the little relationships are satisfying, way more satisfying than shutting down and isolating, way more satisfying than our iThings and the latest status update. When we connect with other humans, there is a mental health payoff.

Give it a try.

Talk to someone. Notice something. Be more present. Engage in your life.

And be happier.


Let me know your thoughts.

10 Ways to Improvise Your Day. The Reboot.

1. Walk a different hall, drive a different route, take a different path.
2. Actually "hear" what is being said to you, not just the words.
3. Talk in an accent at Starbucks.
4. Speak your truth to someone with whom you haven't been lately.
5. Dress your stapler up in character. Name it. Refer to it with a coworker.
6. Do something new every chance you get.
7. Close your eyes. Big breath. Open your eyes. Be present.
8. Take a risk---big or small. Just take a risk.
9. Say yes to 3 things suggested or asked.
10. Be more of who you are.

transitions

Sorry for the radio silence!

I'm back in Chicago from my three months in sunny Mexico. Woe is me!

(honest to God, I sat on this beach. ridiculous.)

I was happily directing the brand new international artist residency in Akumal aptly titled the Akumal International Artist Residency. (Click on the link if you want to know more about that wild and crazy experience. There is a blog on the website as well, tracking the adventures!) I met wonderful artists and helped them share themselves and their work with the sleepy seaside community of Akumal and its neighbors. Many wonderful events and happenings occurred for which I am grateful-- Cesan showed us how to paint with the sun, Katarina showed us young confidence, Magda introduced us to a mermaid, Naomi made us see with our eyes closed, Aaron taught us perspective and Sarah stood in the water for 12 hours making us think and more, more, more! So many vivid experiences on the Mayan riviera. Such a 10 weeks! And now I'm back.

It's a little cold.

I'm getting resettled in my new home in the midwest. Transitions are hard.

Improv shows us that transitions can be important and not something just to blow past on the way to what's next, that the transition can have meaning and maybe even...lead to whats next -- a different "what's next" than you thought. That's why I love long-form improv -- transitions can be fun! So, let's look at what you have to do to make that work on stage.

First of all, you have to be present, pay attention -- look, listen.

You also need to say yes to what you're gifted. Just take it.

And perhaps most importantly, you need to play. You have to be willing to play.  Play the game, play the ride, play the impulse.

Just follow the flow, and voila! you're in the next scene. Magic.

So, maybe that's true in life's transitions too! Maybe at these points in our lives that are uncertain, wobbly even, we just need to look and listen, say yes to what the universe presents us...and play.

Let's both try it and see what happens. Deal?

As always, your comments and questions are welcome. Would be nice to converse...

(not Converse---the running shoes. Just to be clear. Ah, ocean brain.)

Endings

I just heard some news recently. Something has now ended. Officially.

I mean, it's been over for a long time, but it's the real deal now. Yup. No going back. Finito. Sayanara. The end. Ends are hard. I'm not good with ends. I like middles and beginnings. I'm a middle and beginning type of girl. Endings? ...not so much.

I found this quote recently and like it:

“And there are never really endings, happy or otherwise. Things keep going on, they overlap and blur, your story is part of your sister's story is part of many other stories, and there is no telling where any of them may lead.”      ― Erin Morgenstern, The Night Circus

A good improv scene starts in the middle. A good book does the same. Something is already happening. The stakes are high. We are merely thrown into that world---simply or suddenly. And then there's the beginning. Never underestimate a good beginning! It sets the stage. It opens the door. It lures you in.

But endings? Don't like 'em. It's probably why I sort of live in 4 places right now. I don't like things to end. I like doors and possibilities to stay open (sometimes to my detriment.) But things do end, closing the door and any possibility of a new start. And ironically, the only thing left to do is start again. Fresh. Braver, stronger, smarter and older.

Where are you hanging on to things that are long over? Is it time to start a new scene?

Just say it

So here's a little something something.

Lately, I've been hanging on to thoughts that aren't necessarily the truth. I've been lingering in drama and difficulty. I haven't been declaring and living into what could be and maybe what already is. Aaaand it's been weighing me down.

So today, I was walking down the street from missing my yoga class for being two minutes late (2 minutes!! ---come on studio!) and so instead having just had a lovely, heart opening phone conversation with my dear friend Patrick, when I had an epiphany: DECLARE IT, and it will be! Say what you want to be.

In improv scenes, you declare your truth and the scene follows. You will live into what you say out loud. I know this. I teach this. I think I just forgot it or didn't recognize it missing in my own life. (Darned improv philosophy always sneaking up on me!) So I said it: out loud, right there on Carmen Avenue with the cold lakefront wind blowing straight onto my face. I declared a truth, the truth I wanted, the truth that very easily could be the actual truth. (Who's to say it's not!?) And then I smiled. I felt better. Those things are now true. I said them and now I will live them. It's that easy. I feel lighter.

Say what you need to say today. Declare your truth. Then your life and the universe will support it. For realz.

Bah, Humbug!

Its been a tough week of tech rehearsals. Difficult to be holed up in a dark theatre for 12 hours a day, 3 days in a row. I don't do well when holed up in a dark theatre for 12 hours a day, 3 days in a row. Heavy sigh. ( I can do that now that my corset is off! Hallelujah!)

The play is A Christmas Carol. It's a Christmas play---maybe you've heard of it. This ol' dodger named Scrooge gets transformed. It's kind of a sweet story. But these long days, I tell you. It makes a Scrooge out of all of us. Bah Humbug!

But what is my point? I don't know, really -- It's been a long week, as I may have mentioned.

Wait, I remember. Maybe my point is this: just how far kindness goes. A little kindness helps us all out of our tough spots, right? Whatever they may be. Kindness is underrated. It can make or break a day.

Improv teaches it as "making your scene partner look good." When we make each other look good, we look good. And feel good! Crazy! So what does "make your scene partner look good" look life in real life?

maybe it's simply...

• holding the door for someone
• saying thank you
• offering to help
• smiling

and then maybe it goes deeper...

• listening to what someone is truly saying to you
• being present in the moment with your "scene" partner
• allowing ego to dissapate for the sake of something else
• being more patient than maybe you want to be

...in other words...kindness.

Plato is attributed with the quote: "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." I love that one and try to remember it when I don't feel like being particularly kind. We all have our own hard battles--each and every day.

Kindness. Make each other look good. It goes a long way.

I'm gonna try it today...in my black hole.